Whilst I cannot really compare my Sunday dinner to a condemned man's last supper I thought I might make a special effort today. My own runner beans and leeks together with "chopin" potatoes, cauliflower, broccoli, mushrooms and carrots accompanied by an M&S free-range chicken.
On the face of it, consuming a whole chicken by myself does suggest an almost Roman act of gluttony. However, the bird in question happened to be rather small although very tasty indeed. I like to refer to them as M&S "budgerigar" class chickens, although I suspect that to be rather unfair.
An attempted therapeutic bonfire today turned into something completely to the opposite. Everywhere I stood the smoke followed me and with intensely burning holly clippings, at one point I nearly caught fire myself. My consumption by flame might have saved the public purse many thousands of pounds in that the EHRC would not have to try and criminalise me next Tuesday. They will have to wait though, although I suspect if they could get away with sanctioning my cleansing by fire, they would do it.
As always with bonfires, especially ones that are long established, it is always best to check for sheltering wildlife before getting the matches out. I've saved a few hedgehogs before like this, although the scampering rabbit that evaded my preliminary security sweep was fast enough not to need my help in the first place.
Thanks for all of your messages of support, especially those with a gallows humour theme. As much as those IslamoMarxist pieces of filth try to criminalise me, Nick and the rest of us, I will never be made to feel as if I am in the wrong or feel guilty about the colour of my skin.
